It's been an emotional journey, the last few years, to speak to so many people with cirrhosis. When I hear that someone has passed away, my heart hurts, and I feel like I'm going through the loss of my own loved one all over again. My friend Jane passed away at age 78, around this time, last year, and the fall weather and so many other things are reminding me of her. It's been hard, and I've been popping Sam-e and Vitamin D and trying to do what I can to keep from falling into a terrible depression. Some of these songs made me start to cry all over again. But I do think it's therapeutic to allow ourselves to cry and bring some of that pain and loss to the surface sometimes, so that we can release it and move forward.
I wanted to share some of the songs that have helped me to heal from the loss of my own loved ones.
If you'd like to hear these songs in a playlist,
just CLICK HERE.
This one by Carrie Underwood is, in my opinion, the most beautiful one on the list, because it is so uplifting, and it makes me hopeful that I really might get to be able too see my loved ones again, one day.
I have to warn you, this video below is a real tearjerker. But it also might be the most touching video I've ever seen, regarding the loss of a loved one. I remember showing this video to one of my best friends on my cell phone. We were both bawling our eyes out, as we had both lost our fathers, and we both knew what it was like to want to do everything we could, to save them. It's really hard to let someone go, when they are in a hospital, and this video addresses that... but in a beautiful way.
Love this song.
I lost my Dad in 2001, and this song was still being played on the radio a lot. At the time, I had no idea what it was about. It was only years after my Dad's passing, that I learned this song was about Pat Monahan losing his mother to cancer. It took on a whole new meaning, and now, every time I hear it, I think of my Dad and my friend Jane. Really, really beautifully written song. Further down the page, I also included their performance of this at the Grammy's.
I love how Pat Monahan says, in this inteview: "The best thing we can do by loss of love is, find ourselves through it."
I'm embarrassed to admit this, but... like I said earlier, I didn't know what this song was about, when I saw this peformed live at the Grammy's. I just remember thinking, wow. This was a really big performance for a small club band from San Francisco. But boy, did they deserve it. This is such a beautifully written song, I'm giving Pat Monahan a virtual hug to say thank you for writing it.
It just occurred to me, right after I posted this video, that today is 9/11. It really was just a coincidence that today is the day I finally got around to posting this (I'd wanted to make it for a few weeks). I had included Enya's "Only Time" on my youtube playlist of song to help a person heal from loss, but I'm including it here also. My Dad passed away the month after 9/11, and it seemed like this song was being played nonstop on the radio. I'm not from a lovey dovey family where people say "I love you." Like, ever. But a few days after 9/11, I called my Dad and got his answering machine, and at the end of my message, I said, "I love you." And after he passed away, I was going through his answering machine, and I saw that he had saved my message, and it warmed my heart. I still talk to him on occasion, and I talk to Jane, too. They were best friends, and they were both good people, and I can feel that their presence is still with me, and I know they both helped to make me a better person. I think it's not about how long we're alive, but the people we leave a positive impact on, while we're here.
Charlie Puth is a great songwiter, and this is a great tribute song.
Sarah Mclachlan is always a good way to make tears flow.
This song isn't necessarily about loss, but I've included it because I like sharing this with the people who have worked tirelessly to save others. I know that most of the people who read this are caretakers, and people who are trying (or have tried) to save their loved ones. This is a beautiful song.
When I lost my favorite cat of all time, a few years ago, I was devastated. It left a big hole in my heart. I actually got him from Jane, and he was so great, in so many ways, I still miss him to this day. He was like my big baby, and when he passed away, I listened to this song a lot. It made me cry, and just hearing this song makes me cry, to this day. But it's beautiful, so I'm sharing it here.
Beautiful song, period.
I never listened to these lyrics until today. I found this song embedded on a different playlist someone else had created - a bunch of beautiful songs about loss, and this one was on there. Now I will appreciate it even more, next time I hear it.
Beautiful tribute by Eric Clapton, to his son.
Pink is such a beautifully emotive singer. This was also on that playlist I mentioned, earlier.
When Jane passed away last year, my sisters and I had to go to her house and sort through her belongings. I listened to the radio a lot, and during that time, this was being played a lot. One day, I saw the video, and started bawling. It made me think about the pets and people who've brought joy into my life. We want it to be forever, but really, we are all just part of a big life cycle, and the best we can do is to bring happiness to others, while we're here. This is a beautiful song and video.
And lastly... this song is not about death, but it's a song that reminds me of my Dad, because he liked John Denver's music, and at his memorial service, we hired a guitar player who sang this song. Now, it always reminds me of my Dad. We can't keep our loved ones forever, but we can always keep the beautiful memories we have of them, and we can keep them in our hearts forever.
I also want to point out that John Denver is a good example of someone who died too young, but he spent his life creating music and bringing joy to others. Even though John Denver is long gone, we can always keep him alive in our hearts, through his music. We're all making our mark in some small way. My father didn't realize that when he had me, I'd end up writing a blog about cirrhosis (he always encouraged me to be a writer, but probably didn't predict it would be in this form). Sometimes we just don't know what kind of imprint we're going to make on this earth, but we can all become better people, thanks to the experiences we've had, and the people who've been good to us. I like to think we're all here to just keep paying it forward.
To anyone who has lost a loved one, through cirrhosis or any other disease, I hope you will be able to heal, and also to keep their spirit in your heart, as you move through life. And if it is possible, I hope that we will all be able to see our loved ones again, someday.
Ellie
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